mental health jingle

Think less about yesterday, don’t worry about tomorrow, and live every minute of the present moment well.； Don’t climb high, don’t compete with others, your own rhythm is the most comfortable ； If you have emotions, don’t hold on to them, and if you speak out, you will be less panicked. ； Three parts of illness, seven parts of nourishment, don’t treat anxiety as normal. These four sentences were compiled by me following 12 counselors from different schools. They cover 80% of the sources of psychological distress that ordinary people encounter on a daily basis. There are no obscure terms. If you read them twice when you forget them, they will be more or less useful.

Don't tell me, I met Aunt Zhang who danced in the square before. She was worried every day that her son would not be able to find a partner or that her grandson would not be admitted to a good school. She tossed and turned all night long and couldn't sleep. I wrote these few sentences for her on a small card and let her put it on the refrigerator. I met her half a month later and said that now I read these two sentences before cooking. The tension in my heart is much relieved and my sleep is much better. What’s interesting is that counselors from different schools have completely different interpretations of these sentences. No one is right or wrong. Just follow whichever one you believe: Psychoanalytically oriented teachers say that “think less about yesterday, don’t worry about tomorrow.” The essence is to repair unfinished complexes. Don’t always get stuck in ruminating on past regrets, and don’t easily catastrophize future difficulties. ； Teachers from the cognitive behavioral school say that this is the most practical attention anchoring training, which can bring the gods who are wandering in the past and future back to the things at hand now. ； The teachers of existentialism are more straightforward, saying that this is to stop people from living in the pain of imagination, first eat the food in hand, and take a deep breath at the moment. Last month, an old teacher who had just retired told me that he was always annoyed that he was not rated as high before retiring. After two months of reading "Think less about yesterday, don't worry about tomorrow", he now goes fishing in the river every day, and even his high blood pressure has been stabilized.

As for "If you don't climb high, you won't compete", what impressed me the most was a sophomore boy I met last year. His roommate was either getting a national scholarship or preparing to take IELTS to go abroad. He liked to spend time in the studio drawing illustrations. Compared with his roommate every day, he felt like a waste and almost dropped out of school. Later, he wrote this sentence on the corner of the drawing board. When he got tired of drawing, he would glance at it. Now the income from business orders is enough to pay for his tuition. He even bought his parents a new mobile phone a while ago. If you ask a positive psychology consultant, he will tell you that this is to help you establish an internal evaluation system without tying your self-worth to other people's standards. ； If you ask a family therapist, he may say that this is to temporarily remove you from the "social system of horizontal comparison" and figure out what you want first. If you don't follow the path that everyone else is taking, you have to follow it. Of course, some people say that this is an excuse to lie flat. It doesn't matter. Only you know whether your feet hurt or not. There is no need to wear shoes that don't fit because of other people's eyes.

“"Don't hold on to your emotions when you have them." I have said this to people who come for consultation most times. Too many people always feel that "emotions are a weakness" and "it will be over if you tolerate it." There was a young man who was doing back-end development. His boss had been PUA for three months and he refused to say anything. When he finally broke out, he smashed the mechanical keyboard and lost the company 2,000 yuan. If he had asked a friend to complain a few words earlier, even if he shouted into an empty room for ten minutes, he would not have lost control. Different schools of thought deal with emotions differently. Humanistic counselors will tell you to accept them first. You don’t have to think, “I shouldn’t be angry.” ； A behavioral counselor may teach you the 478 Breathing Method to stabilize your physiological state first, and then use whatever method you find useful. You don’t have to follow the textbook.

The last sentence, "30% of illness and 70% of recovery," needs to be made very clear. It does not mean that you should not go to the doctor. If you have been diagnosed with depression or anxiety disorder in the hospital, you should take medicine and seek consultation. These "three points of disease" are the formal treatment that must be completed according to the doctor's instructions, and the remaining seven points are daily mental adjustments. Don't always think "I can get through it with willpower", and don't think "I will never recover from this disease". There was a girl who was diagnosed with moderate depression. In addition to taking the medicine prescribed by the doctor on time, she recited this jingle twice every morning and evening, and went for a half-hour brisk walk three times a week. She went for a review and reduced the medicine in half a year. Of course, some colleagues say that this kind of jingle is just chicken soup for the soul, which is useless. I think that for most ordinary people who have not reached clinical diagnosis standards and are just a little emotionally blocked in their daily lives, it is best to use something that can be used easily. You can't flip through hundreds of pages of psychology textbooks every time you emo, right?

In fact, it doesn’t mean that these few jingles can cure all diseases. It just means that if you get stepped on on the subway one day, get scolded by your boss at work, have a quarrel with your family at home, and feel panicked, just take it out and recite a few sentences, and you will feel as if you have a warm drink and feel better. That’s enough. After all, when it comes to mental health, small adjustments are always more effective than major supplements.